We are going on a trip. A childless trip. I used to hate when people would say " I can't wait to have mommy's night out" or "a weekend without kids!!" I never got it. I couldn't understand why people wouldn't want to spend every waking moment with their children. Of course, that was in the midst of fertility struggles, and I was childless. I have children now. I'm excited for mommy's big weekend that will be childless. I love my kids. I do. I think I've mentioned that before. However, there is something about not seeing formula and not having to mix laxative in a sippy cup ever night that has my excitement soaring. Sad, but true. I know people that feel guilty about leaving their children to spend fun time away. I understand this, but at the same time, how can you be a good parent if you don't focus on yourselves once in a while? That is when couples go to dinner and have nothing to talk about but their children. When you have lost the ability to talk to your spouse about anything but poop and bottles, its time to call a sitter. Has the thought crossed any ones mind that maybe your kids don't want to hang out with you all the time? That's food for thought, my friends.
Went to eat with my brother tonight. He is still home for Christmas, which is odd, cause I was fairly certain he didn't like us that much, but maybe he does after all. Its the Christmas miracle. Anyway, he was talking about my other brothers house, and about how its a perfect party house. Then it happened. I said something that I NEVER thought I would say. I said "Blake, when you have kids those things aren't as important." Let me just get it out there right now-- I'm ashamed of myself. Especially because I lied! They are as important. Well, keg stands and jager bombs may have taken a backseat after college, (although I may or may not have done one at one of my best friends weddings a couple years back in a bridesmaids dress...) but you can still have fun. Maybe I should call him. OR, maybe its good birth control. We wouldn't want little ones running around LA fatherless.
So, I'm packed and ready. I think I took 15 things on hangers, 3 bags, and 6 pairs of shoes. For four days. I am kind of exited. I told John earlier that I don't want to hear it. I'm aware of the ridiculousness of my packing. I'm a girl, and he wouldn't want me to wear sweats all weekend. I can plan out my outfits, but then what if I don't feel like wearing it that day? That would be devastating to say the least. It's all about options, baby.
Oh, and I figured out a resolution. I am going to try to quit cursing, dammit. I'm reminded of a scene in The Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood where Vivi is out in her yard with sparklers around her and praying to whomever she is praying to with her arms in the air, silk nightgown swaying in the southern wind. She swears if she gets this one wish she will quit drinking....well, maybe one...two a night. And she swears she will only smoke once....twice a night. My grandfather used to say that people that curse weren't smart enough to figure out anything else to say.
Apparently he never heard the F word.
I doubt our quaint accommodations have wifi, so I'm afraid I'll be out for a couple of days. Here is to mommy's big weekend out, breaking out the black eyeliner, and throwing on a pretty dress. Hope each of you bring in the new year with loved ones around you, and with a toast to a healthy year full of promise.
cheers.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
My little pumpkins and failed resolution
John William: He's energetic, hilarious, and constantly moving. He is a constant reminder of our multitude of blessings, and continues to dazzle us everyday with his budding personality. He loves Buzz and Woody, beebee's, his bottle, and his brother. He won't eat a thing besides dairy, Capri suns and goldfish crackers. He calls his brother "dookie" and will lay all his weight on him in attempt to show his love. This is not Luke's favorite thing. He's a dancer, and sings twinkle twinkle better than I ever could. He's my first baby, my first miracle.
Luke Coburn: My second miracle, and just as miraculous as Will. He is the one that reminds us that God is in charge, not us. He crawls anywhere his brother is, and hates to be over-loved by Will. (aka, laid on). He hates baby food but can eat fried chicken, and will smile if you look at him just a little bit silly. He is a lover, and would rather take little breaks from playing to come get some lovin from John and I.
Those are my little pumpkins. Such repetitive and selfless blessings, and the most wonderful teachers I've ever had. I'm learning more and more everyday about my strengths, and on bad days, my weaknesses. While I'm sure I will screw up at some point, I'm thinking that we just might make it through this with our sanity in tact.
Lastly, I am remembering something I posted a couple if weeks ago about my need to filter. It may have mentioned something about that being a resolution. Sike. Not happening. I have too much to say, and I've decided it's not a bad thing. Watch your ears, here's to a 2011 full of completely offensive material on child rearing.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Luke Coburn: My second miracle, and just as miraculous as Will. He is the one that reminds us that God is in charge, not us. He crawls anywhere his brother is, and hates to be over-loved by Will. (aka, laid on). He hates baby food but can eat fried chicken, and will smile if you look at him just a little bit silly. He is a lover, and would rather take little breaks from playing to come get some lovin from John and I.
Those are my little pumpkins. Such repetitive and selfless blessings, and the most wonderful teachers I've ever had. I'm learning more and more everyday about my strengths, and on bad days, my weaknesses. While I'm sure I will screw up at some point, I'm thinking that we just might make it through this with our sanity in tact.
Lastly, I am remembering something I posted a couple if weeks ago about my need to filter. It may have mentioned something about that being a resolution. Sike. Not happening. I have too much to say, and I've decided it's not a bad thing. Watch your ears, here's to a 2011 full of completely offensive material on child rearing.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Monday, December 27, 2010
The Great Juice Cleanse
Ok, so I have mentioned that I was thinking of doing a juice cleanse. It all started one night while John and I were watching the most informative of news shows, E! News. They mentioned a juice cleanse and how it rids your body of toxins, etc. SO, we thought it was a brilliant idea for me. Don't ask me why. I have a couple pounds I am ready to say goodbye to, and it wouldn't bother me to clean my liver after all the holiday gatherings. I googled the cleanse they mentioned, and it was going to cost about $300 for 3 days. Being the thrifty shopper that I am, I settled on a lesser known brand that promised the same results, and a decent taste. I ordered, took up unnecessary amount of room in my fridge, and vowed to start it in the midst of the holiday season. That was a stupid plan.
I talked a friend into doing this with me. I'll leave her nameless, because I plan on making a lot of fun of her in the next few days. We started this cleanse today. Well, she started this cleanse today. I packed my juice up in my lunch pail, had great intentions, and abnormally high willpower. I drank the first bottle thinking "I can do this! This is nothing!"
Wrong.
See, when you talk about toxins, and ridding yourself of them, I assumed I knew how that took place. As it turns out, I did not know. At all. I sat in my little cubicle, drinking my juice and my water and WHAM! the great hangover began. I have never had a hangover like this, but its exactly what it felt like. That, or the worst stomach flu of all time. Sweats, dizziness, chills, and the most overwhelming nausea that I have ever experienced. It was miserable. So what did I do? I went to my favorite lunch spot and I chowed on roast beef, mashed potatoes and gravy, and green beans and a gigantic diet coke.
It was divine.
That was the end of my juice cleanse. My friend is trudging through like a champ, but did not have the same symptoms that I experienced. I doubt she could continue if that were the case. I know she is starving, and I have the deepest sympathy for her husband and children. I think at the end of the day I actually gained weight. I'm okay with it as long as I never have to eat or drink anything lemon flavored for the rest of my life.
I deserve a cocktail.
I talked a friend into doing this with me. I'll leave her nameless, because I plan on making a lot of fun of her in the next few days. We started this cleanse today. Well, she started this cleanse today. I packed my juice up in my lunch pail, had great intentions, and abnormally high willpower. I drank the first bottle thinking "I can do this! This is nothing!"
Wrong.
See, when you talk about toxins, and ridding yourself of them, I assumed I knew how that took place. As it turns out, I did not know. At all. I sat in my little cubicle, drinking my juice and my water and WHAM! the great hangover began. I have never had a hangover like this, but its exactly what it felt like. That, or the worst stomach flu of all time. Sweats, dizziness, chills, and the most overwhelming nausea that I have ever experienced. It was miserable. So what did I do? I went to my favorite lunch spot and I chowed on roast beef, mashed potatoes and gravy, and green beans and a gigantic diet coke.
It was divine.
That was the end of my juice cleanse. My friend is trudging through like a champ, but did not have the same symptoms that I experienced. I doubt she could continue if that were the case. I know she is starving, and I have the deepest sympathy for her husband and children. I think at the end of the day I actually gained weight. I'm okay with it as long as I never have to eat or drink anything lemon flavored for the rest of my life.
I deserve a cocktail.
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
The Baby Book Bonanza
My kids don't have them. Well, they do, they are just in a Tupperware, and not a book. I love my kids, I do, and I vowed to be better at this than my mother was.
You see, I got my baby books when I was 20. No, that isn't when she handed them to me in this coming of age ritual, that's when she did them. I won't even get into how there are pictures me with a report card that says "Jordan- 1985" when I was clearly in grade school, not preschool, but whatever... I'm clearly scarred from it.
So, I guess I need to do my kids books. What I have decided to do is do one book per season until they reach grade school, and then make 1 book a year after that. I can order 3 copies of the same book- one for me, one for each of them. Right? Surely there isn't a flaw in this plan. They will only be a year apart in school, so I think its logical.
OMG- just explaining it stressed me out.
I have kind of started, but then the online program I use pisses me off, and I have to delete and start over. And it's not that I don't take the pictures. I have like 10,000 on my computer. Literally. I took a photography class, for pete's sake. So they are there, and they are kind of good. They are just not in a book...
I'm not a scrapbooker. I envy those who are, and those who write down when the first tooth came in, yada yada, but I don't do that. I buy all the calendars and crap to document it, but I don't ever do it. I used to guilt myself , but I am over it. My kids won't care when their teeth came in, or when they got what shot, cause who cares about that??? (Really, if you do, send me a message. I need to know and understand why.) Whatever. I know half of you are thinking the same thing and are scared you will look like a bad momma for not caring. So here it is, OFFICIALLY:
My name is Jordan, and I do not have my kids baby books done, nor do I have immediate plans for completion of said baby books.
There. it's out. Don't be scared anymore.
So, I will continue to throw all their keepsakes in a giant Tupperware, where I am bound to mix them up, and hopefully it doesn't throw them into therapy later.
I've lived a joyous and blessed life, and I feel like I have a great sense of identity, all without my pediatric shot records.
have a wonderful holiday and be nice to each other.
ciao.
You see, I got my baby books when I was 20. No, that isn't when she handed them to me in this coming of age ritual, that's when she did them. I won't even get into how there are pictures me with a report card that says "Jordan- 1985" when I was clearly in grade school, not preschool, but whatever... I'm clearly scarred from it.
So, I guess I need to do my kids books. What I have decided to do is do one book per season until they reach grade school, and then make 1 book a year after that. I can order 3 copies of the same book- one for me, one for each of them. Right? Surely there isn't a flaw in this plan. They will only be a year apart in school, so I think its logical.
OMG- just explaining it stressed me out.
I have kind of started, but then the online program I use pisses me off, and I have to delete and start over. And it's not that I don't take the pictures. I have like 10,000 on my computer. Literally. I took a photography class, for pete's sake. So they are there, and they are kind of good. They are just not in a book...
I'm not a scrapbooker. I envy those who are, and those who write down when the first tooth came in, yada yada, but I don't do that. I buy all the calendars and crap to document it, but I don't ever do it. I used to guilt myself , but I am over it. My kids won't care when their teeth came in, or when they got what shot, cause who cares about that??? (Really, if you do, send me a message. I need to know and understand why.) Whatever. I know half of you are thinking the same thing and are scared you will look like a bad momma for not caring. So here it is, OFFICIALLY:
My name is Jordan, and I do not have my kids baby books done, nor do I have immediate plans for completion of said baby books.
There. it's out. Don't be scared anymore.
So, I will continue to throw all their keepsakes in a giant Tupperware, where I am bound to mix them up, and hopefully it doesn't throw them into therapy later.
I've lived a joyous and blessed life, and I feel like I have a great sense of identity, all without my pediatric shot records.
have a wonderful holiday and be nice to each other.
ciao.
Friday, December 17, 2010
I ate SPAM today.
I did. And, much to my dismay, I have to say that it may be better than bacon. (turkey bacon, that is) It kind of stuck to my teeth a bit- not a fan of that- but it was kind of delicious in an 'ive been drinking a little and this is a great sandwich' kinda way. I can no longer snub canned meat.
SPAM. I googled it and found all sorts of recipes. There is spam sushi. Yup, I'm for real. I wonder what kind of parts are in there. I draw the line when I know an ear, hoof, or cheek is in my SPAM. I'll google that right now.... (pause while I google again...)
Oh wow! Apparently spam is really a "spiced ham" and is just pork shoulder and ham with a lot of chemicals to make it ok for it to be in a can.
However, I'm still skeptical.
Apparently it's a delicacy in Hawaii. That makes it sound better, right?
Maybe not. But the beach sounds nice.
Maybe a recipe from http://www.spam.com/- the blue ribbon state fair champion "Golden Spam Surprise"
And...maybe not. You can go on their website and listen to a song called "Pam don't take my SPAM"
Please Pam! Please take my SPAM.
Why are we naturally terrified of SPAM, but we will eat tuna, no problem? Apparently Jessica Simpson and I were the only two on the planet that thought Chicken of the Sea was actually chicken. I thought there was another can called "Tuna of the Sea", I also "came home" to OK from KS by way of I35 NORTH. Yeah, that was a long day.
that's no lie folks. I have no shame in admitting that.
I encourage each of you to buy a can of SPAM, and be creative. Let me know how it goes. I may even take myself up on my own challenge. I'll post pictures. I've heard that eggs and SPAM is seriously delicious.
have a great weekend-
ciao.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
My handsome fella
Love him. All 6 foot 5, and every bit of concrete dust that follows him into our house.
This man will do just about anything for his family, and if that means sitting his tall and lanky self on a toddler chair while watching Toy Story for the 1000th time, then so be it.
Tall guy, little chair.
He made sure Will had his priorities straight for 2010 election..
An introduced Luke to the world..
And that was all just this year!
He is charming and hilarious, and I drive him bananas, but he loves me anyway. I couldn't be more thankful for the life we've built together.
My cup runneth over.
Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
This man will do just about anything for his family, and if that means sitting his tall and lanky self on a toddler chair while watching Toy Story for the 1000th time, then so be it.
Tall guy, little chair.
He made sure Will had his priorities straight for 2010 election..
An introduced Luke to the world..
And that was all just this year!
He is charming and hilarious, and I drive him bananas, but he loves me anyway. I couldn't be more thankful for the life we've built together.
My cup runneth over.
Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Whats playing on my Ipod...
John would say I have horrible taste in music, but I beg to differ. I love ballads, and I listen to an ipod all day, so I've found that mellow music is the least distracting while satisfying my need to do something other than stare at a computer.
I made a playlist today that is blowing my socks off. I love it. I named it Picnic Blanket because I would like to be on a Picnic Blanket with an actual picnic while this is playing. Maybe a bonfire later in the evening, with lots of good pals around. Preferably on a beach...
Wow. I even lost myself there for a moment.
1) Dave Matthews Band. This should have a presence on every playlist.
2) Tracy Chapman- For You, Run, Fast Car, Baby Can I Hold You
3) Dan Fogelberg- Leader of the Band
4) Indigo Girls- Fleet of Hope
5) Sara Barielles- Hold my Heart, Machine Gun, River
6) John Mayer (see #1)
7) Rilo Kiley- 15
8) Jennifer Knapp- Refine Me, Martyrs and Thieves
9) Missy Higgins- Where I Stood, Nightminds
10) Eric Hutchinson- Food Chain, All Over Now, Ok its alright with me
11) Joshua Radin and Schuyler Fisk- Paperweight
12) Marc Cohn- Maybe I'm Amazed
13) Watermark- Captivate Us, Knees to the Earth
14) James Taylor and Carole King- Machine Gun Kelly, Blossom, Smackwater Jack
15) Third Day- When the Rain Comes
16) Taylor Swift- Never Grow Up, Dear John
17) Jack Johnson-(see #1)
18) Kate Nash- Birds (This song reminds me of John and I. I laugh everytime I hear it.)
19) Michelle Branch- A Case of You
20) Needtobreathe- The Outsiders, Garden
21) Zac Brown- Jolene, Whatever it is, and of course, Chicken Fried
I hope this inspires you to create situational playlists. Not really, but maybe you will find a song you like, and it will remind you of me, and a picnic blanket. Then maybe you will create one called "ski lodge" with songs that make you feel cozy and crave micro brews from little mountain breweries and a big roaring fire.
enjoy.
I made a playlist today that is blowing my socks off. I love it. I named it Picnic Blanket because I would like to be on a Picnic Blanket with an actual picnic while this is playing. Maybe a bonfire later in the evening, with lots of good pals around. Preferably on a beach...
Wow. I even lost myself there for a moment.
1) Dave Matthews Band. This should have a presence on every playlist.
2) Tracy Chapman- For You, Run, Fast Car, Baby Can I Hold You
3) Dan Fogelberg- Leader of the Band
4) Indigo Girls- Fleet of Hope
5) Sara Barielles- Hold my Heart, Machine Gun, River
6) John Mayer (see #1)
7) Rilo Kiley- 15
8) Jennifer Knapp- Refine Me, Martyrs and Thieves
9) Missy Higgins- Where I Stood, Nightminds
10) Eric Hutchinson- Food Chain, All Over Now, Ok its alright with me
11) Joshua Radin and Schuyler Fisk- Paperweight
12) Marc Cohn- Maybe I'm Amazed
13) Watermark- Captivate Us, Knees to the Earth
14) James Taylor and Carole King- Machine Gun Kelly, Blossom, Smackwater Jack
15) Third Day- When the Rain Comes
16) Taylor Swift- Never Grow Up, Dear John
17) Jack Johnson-(see #1)
18) Kate Nash- Birds (This song reminds me of John and I. I laugh everytime I hear it.)
19) Michelle Branch- A Case of You
20) Needtobreathe- The Outsiders, Garden
21) Zac Brown- Jolene, Whatever it is, and of course, Chicken Fried
I hope this inspires you to create situational playlists. Not really, but maybe you will find a song you like, and it will remind you of me, and a picnic blanket. Then maybe you will create one called "ski lodge" with songs that make you feel cozy and crave micro brews from little mountain breweries and a big roaring fire.
enjoy.
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