Ok, so I have mentioned that I was thinking of doing a juice cleanse. It all started one night while John and I were watching the most informative of news shows, E! News. They mentioned a juice cleanse and how it rids your body of toxins, etc. SO, we thought it was a brilliant idea for me. Don't ask me why. I have a couple pounds I am ready to say goodbye to, and it wouldn't bother me to clean my liver after all the holiday gatherings. I googled the cleanse they mentioned, and it was going to cost about $300 for 3 days. Being the thrifty shopper that I am, I settled on a lesser known brand that promised the same results, and a decent taste. I ordered, took up unnecessary amount of room in my fridge, and vowed to start it in the midst of the holiday season. That was a stupid plan.
I talked a friend into doing this with me. I'll leave her nameless, because I plan on making a lot of fun of her in the next few days. We started this cleanse today. Well, she started this cleanse today. I packed my juice up in my lunch pail, had great intentions, and abnormally high willpower. I drank the first bottle thinking "I can do this! This is nothing!"
Wrong.
See, when you talk about toxins, and ridding yourself of them, I assumed I knew how that took place. As it turns out, I did not know. At all. I sat in my little cubicle, drinking my juice and my water and WHAM! the great hangover began. I have never had a hangover like this, but its exactly what it felt like. That, or the worst stomach flu of all time. Sweats, dizziness, chills, and the most overwhelming nausea that I have ever experienced. It was miserable. So what did I do? I went to my favorite lunch spot and I chowed on roast beef, mashed potatoes and gravy, and green beans and a gigantic diet coke.
It was divine.
That was the end of my juice cleanse. My friend is trudging through like a champ, but did not have the same symptoms that I experienced. I doubt she could continue if that were the case. I know she is starving, and I have the deepest sympathy for her husband and children. I think at the end of the day I actually gained weight. I'm okay with it as long as I never have to eat or drink anything lemon flavored for the rest of my life.
I deserve a cocktail.
I did the Master Cleanse for *count em* 24 hours. it was miserable. nasty, nasty. and, actually pretty retarded when you really think about it. but, supposedly it worked for Beyonce. That's the only thing that makes me even consider trying again. :)
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